Statements actually made over Thanksgiving vacation:
Phrases you hear only from the mouths of young children (let's hope): "Nobody wants to hear about your penis!"
Things only your grandmother can say: "You're getting fat!" I considered correcting her: I'm not getting fat, I am fat. But I made some statement about joining the Y instead.
I made some salsa again last night. It turned out yummy, but I learned something very important: the oils from hot peppers don't wash off one's hands very easily. At one point, both of my eyes were stinging from the oils after I unconsciously rubbed them with my fingers.
And then, later, I had to go to the bathroom.
I might just have to buy some disposable rubber gloves the next time I want to make salsa.
I turned 34 last week. They say that 40 is the new 30, but as far as I know, 34 is still just 34.
I wish I had turned 40, so I could be four years younger than I am now.
On the way back from voting, I stopped at Panda Express for some lunch. My fortune cookie had this to say: SOON YOU WILL BE SITTING ON TOP OF THE WORLD. Since I'm not planning any trips to Tibet in the near future, this could mean only one of three things:
I can't decide which is the more realistic option. It has to be one of these. And fortune cookies never lie.
Because I work so close to my polling place, I figured I could avoid the before- and after-work voting crowd by taking my lunch hour a little early and going to vote.
I arrived at 10:40 with two books to read. (I'm nearing the end of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, so I brought a second book in case I finished it.) Two precincts are voting at my polling place. When I got there, I saw one long line and one line with only five people in it. Turns out that both of these lines were for my precinct. There was no waiting for voters from the other precinct, and maybe ten people voted there while I waited in line. (I can't be too certain of that number because my nose was buried Jekyll and Hyde; at any rate, I never saw a line there.)
As I said, both lines — the long and the short — were for my precinct. One was for last names A–M, the other for N–Z. Guess which line I was in!
That's right. I was in the long A–M line. Seems my precinct has more Davises, Johnsons, and Millers than Smiths, Taylors, and Williamses. (Incidentally, I just found a list of the most common surnames in the US; 19 of the top 30 fall into that first half of the alphabet.) Maybe I should change my last name to Ziegfeld so I don't have to spend so much time at the polls?
But, all-in-all, it wasn't terrible. I was out of there by 11:15, and I got some reading done. Now we just need to see if any of the people I voted for actually win. (Cross your fingers that we know the election results before December this time!)
Both my twenty-four(teen)th birthday and Christmas are coming up soon, and people always ask me what I kind of gifts I want. Whenever someone asks me the question, though, my mind goes completely blank. So here I'll keep a running list of things I'd like, so you lucky few who read this blog won't be left in the dark. (A certain amount of analysis can reveal more about what kind of person I am, too, probably revealing more about me than I would like to.)
So, here's my wish list for 2008:
Way back in the early days of the nineties, when big hair bands were giving way to grunge and a Bush-free eight years was just beginning, I took a printmaking class in high school. One of the projects we did was silk screening. I created "my version" of Picasso's "The Old Guitarist," which, hopefully, you can see here:
This is from Picasso's Blue Period. Thinking of him as "The Blue Guitarist," I gave him an electric guitar and sunglasses and made him "The Blues Guitarist." I made six prints (and I'm realizing now that I never took a picture of them). I have one of them (the first one, which definitely wasn't the best one) hanging up in my office cube.
[AND I'LL INSERT IT HERE AFTER I GET A PICTURE OF IT.]
I had since forgotten what happened to the other five. This weekend, I got a Facebook e-mail from Kelly. Kelly wrote to tell me that I had given her one copy of this print, and that she had moved it around from apartment to apartment and displayed it for 16 years, framed even. As you can imagine, this made me feel quite good.
Honestly, I didn't even remember who this Kelly was. I looked through her photos on Facebook for a while before I recognized her. I don't remember actually giving her the print, but I do remember that she was a pretty red-head, which in those days (okay, still!) would have been enough for me to do anything for her. I was such a pushover for a pretty face and red hair.
Too often, things from our past can come up and bite us. It was nice that something from my past came up and gave me a big hug.
It's no secret that, instead of coming up with creative original ideas, TV and movie studios are clamoring to remake hit shows from the 70s and 80s. Underdog, Speed Racer, Get Smart, American Gladiators, Battlestar Galactica Knight Rider, etc.
Well, somebody finally got smart. Instead of putting out the money to create crappy remakes of old shows, someone finally decided to just re-release the old shows instead!
Over at NBC's Wayback Wednesday (http://www.nbc.com/Vintage_Shows/Way_Back_Wednesdays/), you can find episodes of The A-Team, the Alfred Hitchcock Hour, Rod Serling's Night Gallery, Buck Rogers, the original Battlestar Galactica, and a couple of shows I'm not interested in.
I thought it was just NBC, but WOOT!, CBS (http://www.cbs.com/classics/) has The Twilight Zone (the original, with Rod Serling), MacGyver, the original Star Trek, Beauty and the Beast, and HOLY CRAP! MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE SHOW Twin Peaks!
Looks like FOX and ABC need to catch up...and I can just about get rid of my TV and live on my computer.
Without looking at your keyboard, can you figure out what's wrong with this statement:
Okay, so there is really more than one thing wrong with this statement — most notably the fact that someone would be making statements about their penis size in a public forum.
This was just too funny. I had to share.
